Jay Cutler Will Lose Your Fantasy Season For You

As the season approaches I hear more and more fantasy experts on the radio and television, read more articles (here and other places), and even in our own forums, the quarterback du jour is Jay Cutler. Long gone is the idea of getting a top three quarterback. It seems that everyone is espousing the same strategy of waiting on a quarterback and more times than not, the name to draft as round 7, 8, or 9 approaches is Jay Cutler.


- If you combine Cutler & McCown's stats from 2013 he would be a top 5 quarterback!


- It's year 2 in the Trestman offense, and Trestman is the QB whisperer, wrangling wild quarterbacks from the untamed wilds and making them fantasy superstars!

- He has Santonio Holmes!

- He does have one of the best sets of offensive weapons surrounding him in Brandon Marshall, Alshon Jeffery, Matt Forte, and Black Unicorn Martellus Bennett!


Here is a game by game breakdown of how Jay Cutler's season will unfold before our very eyes.

Week 1 vs Buffalo – 250 yards, 2 touchdowns, 1 interception – Nothing awe inspiring in this performance, but you'll take it. You got him in the 9th round!


Week 2 at San Francisco – That vaunted 49er defense. Oh wait, most of them are suspended or hurt? Sign me up! 165 yards, 3 interceptions.

Week 3 at New York Jets – Oh no, Rex Ryan's defense! Better not start Cutler this week. 350 yards, 4 touchdowns.


Week 4 vs Green Bay – Historic struggles vs the Packers in the past, many will sit Cutler. 300 yards, 3 touchdowns, 1 interception.


Week 5 at Carolina – Starting to feel pretty good about Jay now, 650 yards and 7 touchdowns in 2 weeks. 100 yards, 3 interceptions, sacked 6 times.

Week 6 at Atlanta – Last week was an aberration, he will light up the Falcons. 200 yards, 1 touchdown, 2 interceptions.


Week 7 vs Miami – Damn you Jay Cutler, my team is 2-4. Get it together man! 80 yards and 1 interception. Leaves at halftime with a bad ankle.

Week 8 at New England – Ankle is still bothering Jay, sits this one out to get healthy over the bye week. Jimmy Clausen stat line: 400 yards, 4 touchdowns. Raiders try to trade for him at halftime.


Bye Week

Week 10 at Green Bay – Prime time SNF. Jay is back and healthy. Let's light up those Packers one more time! 140 yards, 1 touchdown, 3 interceptions.


Week 11 vs Minnesota – GODDAMMIT JAY, MY TEAM IS 4-6, GET IT TOGETHER MAN. 370 yards, 5 touchdowns.

Week 12 vs Tampa Bay – Thanks Jay, I'm 5-6 and have a shot at the playoffs. Little help here? 300 yards, 4 touchdowns.


Week 13 at Detroit – Sweet, 6-6, one more win and I'm in the playoffs! 300 yards, 3 touchdowns, 1 rushing touchdown.

Sweet, you made the playoffs by the skin of your teeth!

Week 14 vs Dallas on Thursday Night Football. Come on, Jay. Just need an average outing from you. 100 yards, 2 interceptions.


That is how Jay Cutler will lose you your fantasy season.

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